No one on the planet can say "stomach" to me without me automatically thinking of that line from Meatballs where Bill Murray is whispering "Mmmmm. Look at all those steaming wieners. Do you know what they're saying? They're saying, "This is the year that Fink beats 'The Stomach'."
Well, for my part, this is the week the stomach beat me. Last Thursday night I came down with a very acute episode of Stomach flu, and while I'll spare anyone who even bothers to read my blog any of the sordid details, let me just say it was an incredibly draining experience in all ways.
What was so crazy about this illness was the suddenness with which it came on. One moment I was perfectly well, with what I thought was just a bit of abdominal discomfiture, the next moment I'm passed out cold from my blood pressure suddenly dropping followed shortly there after by coming-to to an hysterical wife who thought... well... maybe I was dying. Well, I wasn't, but the tile on the floor felt so good and cold. I almost felt like I was back in college after a night with Mr. Len Tuquila. I digress. This of course was followed, for the rest of the night, with trip after trip to the bathroom and a night of eating ice chips with my wife who also fell victim to this plague as did all my in-laws.
Why am I writing all this? I dunno really. Maybe I'm a little wigged out by the passing out episode. To put more of that in perspective, Sue and I had only just gotten out of the car 1/2 hour - 45 minutes before it happened to me... I dread what might have been had it happened while I was behind the wheel.
Maybe the reason is that since Thursday my internals have been in turmoil by the shock of the whole thing and I'm still having stomach sensitivity (and other things) and that drinking a cup of coffee may as well be drinking a cup of glass shards.
I find the thought of ham steaks to be upsetting and repulsive. I crave Campbells Beef Surloin Burger Chunky soup and white rice.
Oh, yeah, stomach, you're winning. But maybe I've quit coffee too since I'm way past the headache stage. That wouldn't be a terrible shackle to cast off.